True Motivation in Life

"Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first and lessons later." During life, different things keep us motivated to finish the test. I recently returned from a long DoD professional course which took me out of the local area for the last couple of months. During that course, days were long and testing was complex and tedious. However, there were two things pinned up to the wall of my small, bland governmental colored cubicle which motivated me through the toughest of times. Those two items were a picture of Ariana and a copy of John's professional obituary.

A great fond memory of John comes from the Summer of 2006. For the 4th of July celebration, we took the jeep out to Reston for a party there followed by some cheesy neighborhood fireworks which obtained the award for least amount of traffic after a fireworks show in the DC area. During that night, we got into a conversation about my recent experiences in Iraq, and John expressed a sentiment which was usually not expressed between siblings, especially those who fought constantly about who got dibbs on the top bunk bed when we were growing up. The sentiment he expressed was how very proud he was of me. I still remember that conversation vividly, since those words are not uttered as much as they should be. I see it as very fitting that he inspired and motivated me through my professional challenges and accomplishments in the last four years.

The symbol of a small piece of paper tacked to a cubicle wall summed up a large motivation in my life. Looking back, I never took the opportunity to express how proud I was of him and everything he did for me. But, who would ever do that to a big brother? He was the older, more experienced one. But now I got to play catch up. This one piece of paper was my way to tell him in a small way of how proud I am and continue to be of him.

Sort of like parents creating a blog and memorial fund in his memory.